


Nicotine

by MagicMitty



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alcohol, Drug Use, F/M, Fanfiction, Marijuana, Smoking, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Underage Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 08:24:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6947539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicMitty/pseuds/MagicMitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life isn't easy for Adrien Agreste. His father is cold and distant, leaving Adrien without the love he desperately needs while growing up. Adrien finds himself plunged into the world of drugs and alcohol, addicted and slowly killing himself. It's a dangerous hobby that he cannot seem to break. What happens when Marinette finds out about his bad habits? <br/>-<br/>This was originally posted on my wattpad- @MagicMitty! I decided to move it here to reach a wider audience? <br/>Cover art drawn by @taylordraws! You can find more of her amazing work on Tumblr!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cross My Heart and Hope to Die

**Author's Note:**

> OH boy hEre we gO

A lonely black cat sat on the roof of an apartment building, carelessly leaning back against the shingles. Paris was quiet that night, the Eiffel Tower was lit up proudly for all of it's citizens to see. Chat, however, couldn't have cared less. He sat with his back facing the tower, sulking to himself. Life at home was less than ideal for the model when he wasn't disguised as his feline persona.   
Click.  
A bright orange flame spit out of the lighter. He lifted it up to the cigarette he held between his lips. He took a deep breath, letting the effects of the cigarette take over his body. How could something so deadly be so relaxing? He watched the smoke billow from his lips, mesmerized. He knew this tiny thing could easily kill him, even if it was slower than he would have liked. He was aware of the cancer, disease, black lungs, rotten teeth, bad breath. He was aware of the deadly power the cigarette between his lips held. He didn't care.   
Death seemed like a sweet promise to him sometimes, dawning over the horizon. He knew what he was doing with every puff he took, every drug he let into the broken fortress that was his body and mind.   
He would think of his Ladybug with every cigarette he smoked. She was his castle, his savior that kept his head above water. However, her solace could only last for so long.   
Now on this rooftop, she was the only thing on his mind. He knew she wouldn't be coming and that he wouldn't be caught like this. It was his night for patrol. On those nights he took full advantage of them. He would climb up onto the roof of a building and smoke. He let his senses bombard his brain all at once, feeling the nicotine in his veins. Occasionally he would have other drugs with him too. Marijuana was a popular choice for him, he liked the feeling it gave him. The feeling of being without worry and responsibility.  
If Ladybug saw him now, she would be disappointed. More than disappointed, he decided. Which is why he hoped she would never find out about his bad habit.  
He took another long drag from his cigarette, and exhaled into the cold Parisian night.   
"Chat?" Shit.   
He turned his head to see his Lady, a look of utter confusion plastered onto her pretty little face. He grimaced and put out his cigarette.   
"I can explain..." He began before he was cut off.  
"There's nothing to explain, Chat," Her worlds were full of hurt and her voice cracked as she spoke. Oh god, was she about to cry? "Why would you do something like this? Don't you know what cigarettes can do to you?"  
He could only manage a single nod. He was too ashamed of himself to say anything to her. He didn't deserve to defend himself or come up with a lame excuse as to why he was smoking on a rooftop in the middle of the night.   
Chat stood up and approached her, desperation in his eyes. All he could see in hers were the tears welling up. He felt like he had just been kicked in the gut. Ladybug was crying and it was all because of him. Him and his stupid choices.   
"I'm sorry..." What else could you say when there was a huge lump in your throat from the guilt you felt? Her eyes were wet with tears and her lip quivered. He felt like such an idiot. "I won't do it anymore. I'll stop."  
"Promise?" Ladybug whispered.  
"I promise," Chat said and took the pack of cigarettes from his pocket. As much as it killed him to do it, he threw the box over the side of the building and down to the empty street below.  
He felt a pair of small arms wrap around him and looked down to see Ladybug. Her face was pressed into his chest as she held onto him. "Don't ever do anything that stupid again, okay?" Her face tilted up towards his, a few tears slipped down her rosy cheeks.   
"Okay." He said firmly to reassure her, but he knew deep down inside that the words he just uttered to her were all a lie.  
It nearly killed him to say it, too.


	2. It's a Hell of a Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We now delve deeper into Adrien's struggles with drugs, and get a hint of what might have caused it in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of sorry.

Adrien hadn't always been this way. He had more or less a happy childhood. His father wasn't always so cold, he had actually showed that he cared once upon a time.  
Those days were long gone, something changed when Adrien's mother left. His father became even more distant, barely speaking to him for weeks at a time. He would look at Adrien and get this sad look in his eyes. Something like failure or regret. He didn't blame his father for the way he handled it. Adrien was just as heartbroken. His mother had abandoned two people that loved her dearly and needed her.   
Adrien inhaled from the cigarette he held between his fingers. Damn, it felt good. He was without cigarettes for nearly four days and it drove him mad. He was constantly in a bad mood, causing his friends to become wary. He just brushed it off by saying he was tired and that he'd had a lot of photo shoots lately. The last thing he needed was his friendships to be destroyed because of his "little" habit. In reality it was much more than a little habit.   
Adrien had to pay someone to buy his cigarettes for him, him being sixteen and the legal age in France being eighteen. The same person he paid bought his other drugs for him as well. He dropped off Adrien's usual purchase: three packs of cigarettes and a small bag of marijuana. A new addition to his purchase this week was cocaine. The huge sum of money it costed him was almost worth it. Adrien couldn't get rid of the guilt that boiled deep in his stomach. He was going behind Ladybug's back. What she didn't know didn't hurt her, right?  
Adrien pulled up his hoodie to hide his face. He hid the drugs in his bag and ignored Plagg's protests. If he were to ever be caught, his reputation would go directly down the drain and his father would be furious.  
His walk home was quick and uneventful. He made it back to the Agreste Mansion, heading directly up to his room. Plagg flew out of his bag the second Adrien opened it and disappeared. Plagg hated it when Adrien smoked, especially when it was in his room where the smell would linger.   
Adrien pulled his lighter out of his pocket and the bong from his bedside table. He spent the next hour smoking in his room, mind and body relaxed. The smell of marijuana was heavy in the air but he couldn't care less. As long as Natalie didn't catch him, he would be safe. He was guarded from everything and everyone, shrouded in his cloud of cannabis.

-

It got worse over time, Adrien's addictions nearly spun out of control. He soon started partying on the weekends and got into alcohol. He drank dangerous concoctions with no regard for his health. He became careless with himself. He got absurdly drunk every Friday and Saturday night, as well as high on marijuana and amphetamines.  
There was a noticeable change in his appearance and attitude. He had been lacking at recent photo shoots, being extremely tired or hungover from the night before. While the photographers were only mildly annoyed with his behavior, his friends became worried for him. Nino tried to coax the truth out of Adrien when he would show up to school half asleep with dark circles underneath his eyes. Adrien could never let his best friend know the things he did.  
Adrien was restless at school. He constantly tapped his fingers and toes, desperate to smoke something. He knew the danger he was putting his body in, but at this point he didn't care. The drugs he took only made him forget about his life at home and his relationship with his father. Would his father even care if he accidentally overdosed on something or got alcohol poisoning? Would he mourn the loss of his son or a just business pawn? After all, Adrien was treated as a simple puppet. He did what he was told to the best of his ability to please is father. When he thought about this, the more his mind wandered to the thought of a world without Adrien Agreste. He would shake his head, he wasn't weak. He was strong and brave like his alternate persona, Chat Noir. He could conquer anything.   
This demeanor, however, would soon fade away and he would be left alone with his thoughts. Every time he thought about the drugs he took and the havoc they caused on his body, it almost seemed worth it. Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way I do not condone underage drug use. Don't do it, kids.


	3. You're Worse Than Nicotine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit goes down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello naughty children, it is time to die.

Marinette was a smart girl, she always has been. For awhile she was oblivious, but now she has caught on to the changes in two certain golden haired boys in her life. Adrien Agreste and Chat Noir were not the same as before. Their changes in behavior and appearance were eerily similar. The two boys had lost weight and their complexions had become much more pale than usual, to complete the look were heavy bags and dark circles underneath their eyes. Their habits were also very much the same. Adrien left class in the middle of the day, Chat left in the middle of patrol. They were both more irritable and tired than usual. She was worried for both of them, and then she thought a little harder. The similarities the two shared were uncanny, before and after. It finally dawned on her one evening. She was laying in bed after a short patrol that evening. Her sapphire eyes widened to the size of saucers. Her lips parted in disbelief. She was worried about the same boy.  
The next day while out on patrol, Ladybug intended to confront Chat. No, not about his identity. Not yet. She was going to confront him about a more serious matter. He had lied to her. He lied to her when he promised he wouldn't smoke anymore. She could smell the aroma of cigarettes on him when he would come back from his little breaks during patrol. She could see the slight shake of his fingers and the guilty look in his eyes. He knew he was betraying her, yet he still did it anyway.  
Her heart tightened when she saw him sitting on the roof of their usual meeting spot. He sat casually, looking out into the sea of stars that covered the Parisian horizon. He looked so calm and serene, his chest rose with each breath he took. His breaths seemed to be deep and he would take a long time to exhale, that was when she noticed the tiniest plume of smoke coming from his leather clad fingers. She let out the tiniest of noises, something between betrayal and surprise. She knew he lied to her, she knew it. She was right. Chat heard her and turned his head, eyes wide.  
"Ladybug I..." He began.  
"Don't," She began, "say a single word to me. I knew it. I knew you lied to me."  
He looked down, his eyes were like a wounded animal's. "I'm sorry."  
"Oh, not this again. You broke your promise, Chat." Her voice was shaking, her were fists clenched so tight that she could feel her fingernails digging their way through the spandex of her suit. "I can't even look at you."  
Those words were like a slap in the face, no, they were much worse. They were like a gunshot to the heart. Chat shrunk into himself, his long forgotten cigarette on the ground next to him. He could feel the pressure in his eyes, the stinging that meant tears were coming.  
"You're right." He muttered. "I'm a horrible person and you have every right to hate me."  
She stood, shoulders taught and hands balled into tight fists. She swallowed hard and clenched her jaw to keep from crying. If she opened her mouth, she felt like tears would spill down her cheeks instead. Her heart was thumping in her ears, it was so loud. Unbearably loud. Her blood rushed and sweat trickled down her neck. She knew deep down that he didn't deserve to be treated to coldly, but he had broken their promise. Any promise between them was sacred. This promise was one that that could have saved his life years down the road. She had no idea how long he had been smoking or how often. She didn't know what other things he was doing that he was keeping a secret from her. All she knew was that he needed to stop, soon, or it would be too late.  
"I don't deserve to be a hero. Not anymore. I failed." Chat said before running across the rooftops and into the night. The second he disappeared she broke down into ragged sobs.  
"No Chat. I failed you."  
The next day at school was even worse. Marinette planned to confront Adrien as well. If she could get to both of his halves and convince him to stop, maybe it would work. Maybe if he heard it coming from two people, then he would take her warning seriously. She remained hopeful throughout the day, even if her heart was beating in her throat. In the middle of class, Adrien asked to be excused. Marinette waited a few moments and asked to be excused as well. To her dismay, Ms. Bustier denied her request. She would have to wait until her next chance.  
Adrien didn't ask to be excused for the rest of the day, but the next day he did during physics. Ms. Mendeleiev allowed him to leave. When Marinette asked a minute later, Ms. Mendeleiev let her go.  
Marinette ran lightly on her toes to catch up with Adrien. She spotted him turning the corner to leave the school. Just like a ninja or a spy in the movies, she crept behind him and ducked for cover when she thought he was going to turn around. He turned the corner again to the side of the building, then behind. He hid in the shade of the few trees that were around. She hid behind a tree and watched as he pulled a lighter and a box of cigarettes from his back pocket.  
"I knew it," She whispered.  
Adrien slid a out cigarette from the box and held it between his teeth as he lit it. He took a long drag from the cigarette and exhaled. A cloud of smoke escaped from his lips. He looked so natural, like he's done it a thousand times before. She waited for his guard to be completely down before confronting him. He took three more drags from the cigarette. Her heart thumped in her chest as she stepped out from behind the tree and approached him.  
"Adrien." She said firmly. She wouldn't allow her voice to deceive her by cracking, no matter how forlorn or livid she was.  
The look on his face was something indescribable. He face first was blank, then twisted into utter disgust, then finally picked a resting expression of shame. He dropped his cigarette and stomped it into the ground. He muttered things she couldn't hear.  
"Please don't tell anyone," He began, panic rising in his voice. "My image will be ruined and my father will kill me if anyone ever finds out about this." He spoke quickly, words coming up from his throat and tumbling out of his mouth.  
"I won't, but what I want to know is... why? Why do this to yourself?" Marinette spoke, taking a step toward him.  
Just minutes before the sun was shining, the sky was a relaxing baby blue, and the grass seemed vivid. Now all light and brilliance was sucked from the world. The sun hid behind grey clouds, the sky was a dull gray, and the grass was dying. The exact same thing happened to Adrien, like he was the world's sunshine. He would always shine so bright and lighten up anyone's day without fail. Ever since she had caught Chat smoking on the rooftop many nights ago, Adrien's light had been flickering out.  
A long and heavy silence hung between the two teenagers. Adrien shifted his weight and blew a lock of hair out of his face. Marinette stood with her back ramrod straight and fists tightened. She pursed her lips when neither of them spoke for a full minute.  
"Please tell me." Again, silence.  
After another full minute, Adrien finally showed signs of life again. He shuffled towards her and sighed.  
With out any explanation he simply said, "Follow me." And she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also indenting is being a bitch to me. I'm too lazy to fix it.

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah. This is a thing. I'm not sorry.


End file.
